Dealing with adversity is painful experience, especially if long term, but witnessing a loved one going through adversity is much worse. We feel helpless not knowing what to do or say that will help. Well, the answer lies beyond us. It lies with Christ, so the first thing we need to do is pray and listen. Listen for God’s response but also listen to our loved one suffering. God’s Word does provide reliable advice for every situation. Below are some examples of council and instruction scripture provides:
DEALING WITH AND MOVING BEYOND DISCOURAGEMENT
A good start is to reflect on past personal examples of God’s faithfulness and how God enabled or provided help and solutions. Also read examples from scripture. Pray and let God guide you to those examples and then quiet yourself to let Him speak to you through those examples.
“For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.” Jeremiah 29:11
This verse has helped and reminded me often that I can and need to trust God and rely on Him in all situations. It helps quiet my anxiety and sense of urgency to do something instead of waiting on Him first. If God can wait before responding, that we need to wait on Him. Waiting is one of the hardest things to do, especially during crisis but all too often, a quick response is harmful and counterproductive, requiring extra effort to “undo” the harm a quick response caused. Taking even a few minutes to pray and quiet our spirit to listen to His response can be so important to solving the situation before us. It is one thing to trust Him enough to pray for help, but it is quite another to wait for Him before responding with our own ideas and thoughts and choice.
Discouragement comes with loss of hope and options of a solution. When we try everything we can think of first and become discourage, we waste precious energy pursuing our own ideas and desires first instead of resting and waiting and praying so He can not only guide and point us to the right solution but also energy us to follow through with implementing that solution. After all, He may be delaying to also prepare others to help and prepare other situations to enable our solutions too.
Yet the one thing we also need to realize is that how we deal with our own problems and discouragement may indeed be observed and influence how others deal with theirs.
Fear of Failure. Includes Fear of being ineffective for God
Overcoming fear and weakness and discouragement is a common ailment God has helped people with in every generation since Adam. Scripture is full of examples from Old Testament and New Testament times. Examples of real dangers and hardship and crisis that went well when His people sought Him and followed His council and instruction and didn’t go well when they didn’t and followed their own.
God doesn’t require us to be perfect, but does require us to be faithful. To follow His instruction. The Israelites who witnessed the plagues in Egypt, the parting of the Red Sea, the provision of the manna and quail, the giving of the 10 commandments to Moses, the consequences of disobedience when they didn’t follow Joshua and Caleb’s council to enter the promise land, not being faithful waiting for Moses at Mt. Sinai. They still found it difficult to trust God when facing real enemies with formidable strength. Yet, God still was faithful to them and gave them opportunity to repent and follow Him again.
“Arise, go over this Jordan, you and all this people, to the land which I am giving to them—the children of Israel. Every place that the sole of your foot will tread upon I have given you, as I said to Moses.” Joshua 1:2-3
Taking time to reflect and remember examples of God’s faithfulness often and regularly will strength our faith and allow Him to council us and quiet our fears and doubts and uncertainty. Doing so will also build courage to proceed using His council. Waiting for Him requires courage but proceeding when He gives that council also requires courage.
Dealing with Ongoing Illness and Remaining Strong
Battling physical illness is a challenge everyone has or will face both personally and certainly with loved ones, especially elderly loved ones. Loss of health exposes us to enduring chronic pain, weakness, discouragement, and loneliness. Especially when lose due to death leaves us alone and missing the dear one who passed. Health challenges can and should be face the same way we face other challenges in the Christian life. Faced with trust and faith in God and His power to accomplish His purposes. At our Church Family Camp Retreat this year, our evangelist discussed the many Blessings Christ bought for us on the Cross besides our Salvation. Healing is one of them. He shared that healing is more common and available than we realize or embrace. Healing if as freely offered and available as forgiveness, but does have a few “guardrails” in place to prevent misuse. Guardrails like:
- Not all suffering is due to sin (Job)
- Jesus puts a higher priority to soul healing when physical healing would hinder.
- Jesus puts a higher priority to what it takes to save others. Joni Eareckson Tata is a example.
- Some suffering is not healed until root cause is corrected or resolved.
- Timing and method of healing is to focus on and bring Glory to God.
- People of Jesus’ day had limited medical help but divine healing can and more often today includes doctors and nurses but is still God’s handiwork.
- Sometimes there are good God chosen reasons for not seeking physical healing.
- Approaching God with boldness and humility is required so a humble spirit may need developed first before healing is possible.
Keep in mind, healing was an integral part of Jesus ministry and the disciples after the Holy Spirit came at Pentecost. It continues to be so if we take time to discover how often God heals in our daily lives already.
“Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us, to Him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus to all generations, forever and ever. Amen”. Ephesians 3:20-21
Will God Ever Stop Loving Me?
The short answer is NO, NEVER!! God not only loves but is LOVE (1 John 4:16)
We think of love only as a feeling but for God it is a choice. So He loves because He chooses to and we need to leave to love as a choice whether we feel the love emotion and especially when we don’t”.. Romans 8:38-39
How Can I Experience Peace Amid Financial Troubles?
Financial crisis is in epidemic levels today. Credit card debt has crippled so many people and families. Buying things they don’t need with money they don’t have to impress people that don’t care. But Christ tells us to instead of gathering treasures on earth that decay and wear out, to instead gather treasures in heaven than will last forever. God will help us reset our priorities and implement wise spending parameters to bring us out of debt.
It is amazing what we can live without when we set our minds to it. So many things we think are necessities are luxuries. Consider how people live and what they live very well without in poor countries or even in poorer parts of our country. Living on less and living below our income is not only possible but necessary in order to build a strong financial future. Doing so not only will give us peace of mind, but will enable us to have funds for necessities going forward, enjoy the freedom financial strength gives, and empower us to become generous givers.
“Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal; but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also. ” Matthew 6:19-21
How Can I Deal With Anger Toward My Spouse?
Spousal abuse and broken relationships is all too common. Children and spouses coming out of horrible family environments is at epidemic levels. God didn’t intend nor design families to be a burden or problem but a blessing and solution. Families, however, are made up of sinful flawed people, so flaws and sins prevail in every family. However, families who prioritize having Christ at the center influencing individual choices and willingness to repent and forgive is essential to bring healing and health back into the family and in each person of that family. When one member is dominantly sinful and rebellious, the whole family suffers but influence of one person who is faithful to and stays focused on his or hers relationship with Christ and faithfulness to Him, that influence will have positive effect on the rest of the family. The apostle Paul says the remedy is to deal quickly with the issues that fuel anger (Ephesians 4:26)—not impulsively, but in a way that promotes forgiveness and reconciliation. He also warns that failure to resolve anger quickly gives “place to the devil” (Ephesians 4:27). Swift reconciliation is the best way to keep the devil where he belongs—out of your marriage.
Danger of physical abuse and harm may warrant help and protection available from police and other authorities while wise Godly pastors and counselors and church people will provide needed support and strength to enable healing and restoration of both victims (abused) and abusers.
“Pursue peace with all people, and holiness, without which no one will see the Lord: looking carefully lest anyone fall short of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up cause trouble. ” Hebrews 12:14-15
How Can I Deal With a Rebellious Child in My Home?
Parents have a God given place of responsibility in the home. They can’t protect their adolescent children from the pain of rebellion, but they can stay beside them to provide safety and security. Firm boundaries and loving correction are necessary—prayerful parents must do their best to find wisdom seeking and implementing God’s council. Maintaining firm boundaries and allowing children to endure consequences of their poor choices is a very hard part of parenting but a necessary part. But above all, parents must remain vigilant in their quest to love a rebellious child unconditionally and communicate that love. The dangers of drugs and alcohol and evil influence of other rebellious youth all are powerful negative influences on our children and all too often destroys positive influence parents have worked hard to provide.
But we need to remember God loves our children even more than we do and is working hard to provide choices to them that will bring them back to us and even more important back to Christ. When we remain faithful and follow His direction, we are encouraging and supporting His work and efforts to that goal. When we follow our own ideas, we all too often hinder that goal.
“If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him.” James 1:5
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